So you want peace. You want to be able to keep cool under pressure.
1. First you have to find out what triggers you.
2. Then figure out the stages of your anger (How does your anger build?). Many people are unaware that they are even getting angry. Bringing this into awareness can give the person much more control over their anger.
3. Decide at what stage you can make a different decision to get out of the situation for a cool down period.
4. The big picture way to deal with anger management is to find a way of viewing yourself and the situation that does not make you feel humiliated or squeezed.
5. Another way to deal with anger is to learnassertiveness skills: One assertiveness skill is to speak up gently whenever someone is irritating. Repeat quietly that you are irritated and describe to the person their behavior. Example: “When you park behind me in the driveway I can’t get out.”
6. Who is in your jury box? If you are unconsciously carrying around people in your head that are judging you, criticizing you, humiliating you, and putting you in no-win situations, then you will become very angry or very depressed. Figure out a way to get them out of your jury box, and think of positive people in your life to put in your jury box.
7. Take the Adverse Childhood Experiences Questionnaire. It can help you focus on the childhood experiences that may be fueling your anger.