Baby Blues: Adjusting to a new-born can be a daunting task for some people, especially if the mother is hit with "baby blues," or postpartum depression. A child who does not sleep through the night can quickly take the starch out of a parent. Some children have physical issues, others need a different connection with the parent in order to feel secure. Many mothers feel traumatized by the propcedures or hospitalization required for birth.
Toddlers often want their own way and sometimes throw tantrums at the worst times. Do you envy those parents who seem to take it in stride and keep their cool even when their child is having a meltdown?
Setting limits and attaching consequences can sometimes be difficult, especially when parents are choosing to do a different parenting style to the one they grew up with. Teaching siblings to get along can be challenging. One of the best books available is: Siblings Without Rivalry by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish.
Not sleeping through the night often occurs in children who were a difficult pregnancy, or who are second children, following a well-behaved child. Sometimes play therapy led by the child is helpful, looking for missed cues. When the relationship between parent and child shifts the child often begins to sleep more peacefully.
Some researchers have found that about one third of students are not gifted with schooling type gifts: attention to detail, secretarial skills, being able to sit still for long periods, and being able to listen for detailed instructions. Learning to appreciate the gifts our children have, as well as helping them in areas they are weak, will serve our children for the future. Contrary to popular opinion, the one third of the population, that does not do well in school, goes on to have careers that our society depends on for its functioning. Every person is valuable.
Teenagers have the task of declaring independence from their parents so that they can get ready to move out and make all their own adult decisions. Teens experiment with decision-making in ways that sometimes frighten parents: tobacco, alcohol, marijuana, other drugs, sexual experimentation and curfew violations are choices that can be dangerous. Learning to deal constructively with teens who are rebelling is a difficult skill to learn.
Mark and his wife have raised two children, now gainfully employed adults, and have gone on to raise several foster-children.
Two recommended books are: Get Out of My Life, But First First Could You Drive Me and Cheryl to the Mall by Anthony Wolf, Parent/Teen Break-Through: The Relationship Approach by Mira Kishenbaum and Charles Foster. .